By Lonz Cook Blog | March 04, 2016 at 12:29 AM EST | No Comments
You found a specimen, the perfect person in pixels, with a collaborating description and spot on distance. As a woman, you want to break the ice and your profile says a lot. As a matter of fact, you pride yourself on blissful honesty. You let him know, and everyone else, that you're in search of marriage. It's the only reason you're online,
Yes, it works being so up front and sharing your objective. Its like the yellow flashing sign in a busy roadway intersection. Before he responds he needs to know, its all or nothing. You got it, up front and honest.
One line after the other, you meticulously create an introduction in addition to the thousand characters you shared at the time you opened the account. You shared your dreams, your fears, and your hopes for a companion. And still with brutal honesty about your objective and why you're online. You're finish, and now it's the tap sending the icebreaker hopeful of a lifetime.
Click, and it's gone! Your reach to a total stranger is now in cyber space, hopefully landing on a page who's owner is as honest as apple pie. It's your chair squeaking from the nervous energy of anticipation. It startles you to believe your insightful and detailed message is right and effective as an icebreaker. Like many have said to me before, "I want him to know what I want and need. Why mess around. Either he wants to or he doesn't."
You know what's bad about the scenario?
It's the perception you sent specifics about you to an honest stranger. He knows you want wedding plans, and don't have time to play (dating anyone) as your objective is to make it happen. Hey, you wrote it plain as day. So don't get angry when it returns with exactly what you seek.
I said he responds with what you seek. The man is committing to you via email and agrees to focus on marriage. Right off the bat, he doesn't know you from Adam, but plays into your mind as if, he's the real deal. He writes you an in depth explanation on why he wants marriage and cares less about dating. He's willing to meet you, tomorrow and make the connection real. As a matter of fact, he's sending you his physical address to show proof.
Without a second thought, you're jumping for joy with a smile of success. No dating to worry about, let's get this party started.
Sounds lovely - right? Sure it does up to the point you realize he's responding to exactly to your brutal honestly. He's playing up to you, because you are so determined to find that guy. He's doing whatever it takes to get you out of your money. Yes, I said it...out of your money.
Men prey on women who swears to know the ropes of online dating. Some men, not all, will say the right things, entertain, and persuade because you give them the fuel they need. Your brutal honesty tells them how to maneuver into your life's savings. Or play on your loneliness, and have you look beyond common sense. Its about your emotions and you gave him the key.
Stop saying you want marriage right off the bat to total strangers. Stop giving your inner thoughts as brutal honesty. Start saying friendship and fun, so expectations are exactly that, friendship and fun. Who starts a relationship without being friends, specifically with the objective of marriage?
I'll never understand why marriage is so important as your objective.